FOR REAL?????

So, I'm brand new to this.  I've never blogged, don't know a thing about blogging and I don't follow any blog religiously but here I am.

I'm going to thank my sister in-law for suggesting I do this so I can purge my thoughts and answer questions my mammoth family (whom I am so blessed to have! Otuto diri Yesu!) and a dear friend who also suggested I do this and actually helped and showed me how to set it up.

This is a therapeutic blog and also a sort of PSA.  I am a pretty private person but I just had to share this and I will welcome advice, opinions, constructive criticism, encouragement, etc.

I'm pretty much a healthy, vibrant person, no major health issues, so imagine my surprise when I was told on Monday, October 21st, 2013 that I have "Invasive Lobular Carcinoma"! Abeg oo, this one na heavy oyibo!!!  Hold up, wait a minute, back-up, rewind, slow your roll!!!  I had a normal routine mammogram middle of May, 2013.  I had a normal breast examination performed by my Primary care doctor in April and also by my GYN in May, 2013. How the hell can I have breast cancer?? No family history, no abnormal mammograms ever; wharra HELL!!

No, I didn't have any sort of premonition, didn't have a vision or hear a voice whisper in my ear.  I was taking a shower in the usual fashion of course and felt a lump, it caught me off guard and my first thought was that maybe something bit me because it was a pretty palpable lump.  However, it didn't hurt and it was immobile so it did make me raise an eyebrow.  After my shower, I went to the mirror, I inspected it, there was no reddness, no bruising, no pinpoint entry, nothing.  I had my hubby feel it (yup, he got a quick thrill) to make sure I wasn't crazy and he definitely felt it.

Ok, fast forward.  I sat on it for a day, called my GYN a day later, I was seen within 2 or so days, I was told it was probably a "Lactational cyst" (more asusu oyibo) as I had a baby 21 months ago and I still lactate (sorry, TMI).  It was recommended that I have a diagnostic ultrasound & mammogram.  Had to wait a week and a half for it, finally went, was told I would only have an ultrasound since I was still intermittently breast-feeding (apologies; TMI).  Had the ultrasound, was told it was not suspicious for any malignancy; that it could be an abscess or hematoma (thank God I own a dictionary app on the phone because at this time I was side-eyeing the man like what the heck you talking about).  Left there not feeling confident and I knew I would be getting a second opinion. 

Thank God I remembered to request a copy get sent to my Primary care doctor because in 2 two days she contacted me to find out what the heck was going on.  Briefed her, and she immediately got me in to see Dr. Deckers at University of Connecticut Health Center.  He reviewed my previous mammogram film and confirmed that nothing was in it, looked at the ultrasound report and said it could most likely be a lactational cyst but because I am over 40 he would feel more comfortable and have more peace of mind if I had a breast biopsy.

Breast biopsy 10/17/13 (by Dr. McDreamy).  At work on 10/21/13, phone call comes in at 9:15 am.  All I remember is hearing "the pathology came back showing malignant cells, I'm sorry to tell you we found cancer".  SHOCK, DISBELIEF, TEarsssssss!!! This can't be for real, it can't be for real.  I'm 42 years old, just learned how to fully love and appreciate myself, I finally feel confident, smart, bold, fabulous, sexy and I'm being told I have left breast cancer.  Heck! I was talking to sister a weeks prior that I was planning to get a Mercedes Benz S-class and breast implants for my 50th birthday.

On Thursday, 10/31/13, I'll be having a lumpectomy.  This sucker will be taken out, further tested and I will know what the plan of treatment is.  I acknowledge the cancer, but I am not accepting or claiming it.  I'm going to roar, I'm going to fight.  I am not going to be a survivor.  I'm going to be a CHAMPION!!  PRAYERS!!! I need prayers.  God has declared & decreed that I am healed.  No morbid thoughts in this hen's head.  No, no, no!  I'm too cute to even consider being 6 feet under (the ground will purge and spit my butt back up).

Please, please, please ladies, check your breasts!  Check your tickle-bitties.  Once a month just do it.  If you think you'll forget, set a standard "check my breasts date" with your significant other.  Why not get something out of it?  The kind of cancer I have is not typically picked up by mammogram.  I have so many questions, and I will have them answered in time.  My guys, although it is uncommon, men can get breast cancer too.  Check your breasts. If you are of the age, get a mammogram.  IF YOU FEEL ONE, DON'T IGNORE THE LUMP!!
Enough for this virgin blogger.  My fingers are tired, but my shoulders feel lighter.  Thank you for sharing a little bit of my world with  me. I will try to blog over the next few days to share my experiences on this new journey.  My maiden name is ANOSIKE.  It means "I stand firm/strong".  God bless you all.

Chidinma