The Little Lone Gray Hair

I'm completely bald now.

 

But there's one little strand of gray hair on my left temple.

 

That resilient strand of gray hair that won't fall out. I tried to pull her out but I've got peripheral neuropathy in my fingers so it's hard to get a grip on her. 

 

As I look upon that one lone strand of gray hair an eyesore on this chocolate scalp of mine and suck my teeth at it in irritation, it dawns on me; THAT'S ME!! My baldness reflects breast cancer and that little strand of stubborn gray hair is me standing firm! Resilient! Tough! Refusing to bow into the mental angst that is plaguing me at this time. I am going to continue to be resilient. I can't give in. I can't continue this pity party I started for myself this morning. After all, I've been at it for hours and no guests have arrived!! Mscheww! Well it's a good thing. Let me get out of this funk. One day at a time we always say. One day at a time.

 

It's been 3 months since I was diagnosed. Since this whole saga started.  I'm tired. Mentally and physically tired. I'm not used to this. It's weighing down my psyche. But I must persevere. I salute all the persons whom have trod this road before me and who are on this journey right now and for those who will unfortunately travel this road in the future. It is well. Like the song says;

 

"When peace like a river attendeth my way, when sorrows like sea billows roll; whatever my lot, thou hast taught me to say it is well; it is well with my soul."

 

"God will always give what is right to his people who cry to him night and day and he will not be slow to answer. Luke 18:7"

 

So befitting it was that this song started to play during the height of my pity party and I do so much love this song that it definitely helped reboot & reset my brain and I had to come to the conclusion that it was time to "put on my big girl panties" and shake off the "me, me, me". Brooklyn Tabernacle Choir's;

Jehovah Jireh, my provider, you are more than enough for me, Jehovah Rapha you are my healer by your stripes I have been set free, Jehovah Shamma you are with me and you supply all my needs. You're more than enough, more than enough, you're all I need, you are more than enough for me. 

 

Thank you Lord for letting me see that lone strand of hair and remembering that you are carrying me and I am not alone. You are more than enough for me. In all things, I continue to praise and worship you. 

 

No matter what your circumstances are, remember that you are not alone, no matter how bad the pain, the sorrow, the angst, you are not alone, you must believe that up above, the healer of all healers, the lover of your soul, the Master, our Holy Father is embracing and comforting you. You may not feel it now but you will. Trust me you will. Do not despair.  He is more than enough.  Yes; he's more than enough for you.